[I dig a Pygmy by Charles Hawtrey and the Deaf Aids...
Phase One in which Doris gets her oats.]

Two of us riding nowhere
Spending someone's
Hard earned pay
You and me Sunday driving
Not arriving
On our way back home
We're on our way home
We're on our way home
We're going home

Two of us sending postcards
Writing letters
On my wall
You and me burning matches
Lifting latches
On our way back home
We're on our way home
We're on our way home
We're going home

You and I have memories
Longer than the road that stretches out ahead

Two of us wearing raincoats
Standing so low
In the sun
You and me chasing paper
Getting nowhere
On our way back home
We're on our way home
We're on our way home
We're going home

You and I have memories
Longer than the road that stretches out ahead

Two of us wearing raincoats
Standing so low
In the sun
You and me chasing paper
Getting nowhere
On our way back home
We're on our way home
We're on our way home
We're going home

We're going home
Better believe it

I dig a pony
Well you can celebrate anything you want
Well you can celebrate anything you want
Ooh.
I do a road hog
Well you can penetrate any place you go
Yes you can penetrate any place you go
I told you, all I want is you.
Ev'rything has got to bejust like you want it to
Because

I pick a moon dog
Well you can radiate ev'rything you are
Yes you can radiate ev'rything you are
Ooh.
I roll a stoney
Well you can imitate ev'ryone you know
Yes you can imitate ev'ryone you know
I told you, all I want is you.
Ev'rything has got to bejust like you want it to
Because

I feel the wind blow
Well you can indicate ev'rything you see
Yes you can indicate ev'rything you see
Ooh.
I dug a pony
Well you can syndicate any boat you row
Yes you can syndicate any boat you row
I told you, all I want is you.
Ev'rything has got to bejust like you want it to
Because

Words are flowing out like endless rain into a paper cup,
They slither while they pass, they slip away across the universe
Pools of sorrow, waves of joy are drifting through my open mind,
Possessing and caressing me.
Jai guru deva om
Nothing's gonna change my world,
Nothing's gonna change my world.
Images of broken light which dance before me like a million eyes,
They call me on and on across the universe,
Thoughts meander like a restless wind inside a letter box they
Tumble blindly as they make their way
Across the universe
Jai guru deva om
Nothing's gonna change my world,
Nothing's gonna change my world.

Sounds of laughter shades of earth are ringing
Through my open views inciting and inviting me
Limitless undying love which shines around me like a million suns, it calls me on and on
Across the universe
Jai guru deva om
Nothing's gonna change my world,
Nothing's gonna change my world.

All thru' the day I me mine, I me mine, I me mine.
All thru' the night I me mine, I me mine, I me mine.
Now they're frightened of leaving it
Ev'ryone's weaving it,
Coming on strong all the time,
All thru' the day I me mine.

I me me mine, I me me mine,
I me me mine, I me me mine.

All I can hear I me mine, I me mine, I me mine.
Even those tears I me mine, I me mine, I me mine.
No-one's frightened of playing it
Ev'ryone's saying it,
Flowing more freely than wine,
All thru' the day I me mine.

I me me mine, I me me mine,
I me me mine, I me me mine.

All I can hear I me mine, I me mine, I me mine.
Even those tears I me mine, I me mine, I me mine.
No-one's frightened of playing it
Ev'ryone's saying it,
Flowing more freely than wine,
All thru' your life I me mine.

Like a rolling stone
A like a rolling stone
Like the FBI and the CIA
And the BBC, BB King
And Doris Day
Matt Busby
Dig it, dig it, dig it
Dig it, dig it, dig it, dig it, dig it, dig it, dig it, dig it

[That was 'Can You Dig It' by Georgie Wood. And now
we'd like to do 'Hark The Angels Come'.]

When I find myself in times of trouble
Mother Mary comes to me
Speaking words of wisdom, let it be.
And in my hour of darkness
She is standing right in front of me
Speaking words of wisdom, let it be.
Let it be, let it be, let it be, let it be.
Whisper words of wisdom, let it be.

And when the broken hearted people
Living in the world agree,
There will be an answer, let it be.
For though they may be parted there is
Still a chance that they will see
There will be an answer, let it be.
Let it be, let it be, let it be, let it be.
There will be an answer, let it be.
Let it be, let it be, let it be, let it be.
Whisper words of wisdom, let it be.

Let it be, let it be, let it be, yeah let it be.
Whisper words of wisdom, let it be.

And when the night is cloudy,
There is still a light that shines on me,
Shine on until tomorrow, let it be.
I wake up to the sound of music
Mother Mary comes to me
Speaking words of wisdom, let it be.
Let it be, let it be, let it be, yeah let it be.
There will be an answer, let it be.
Let it be, let it be, let it be, yeah let it be.
There will be an answer, let it be.
Let it be, let it be, let it be, yeah let it be.
Whisper words of wisdom, let it be.

Oh dirty Maggie Mae they have taken her away
And she never walk down Lime Street any more
Oh the judge he guilty found her
For robbing a homeward bounder
That dirty no good robbin' Maggie Mae
To the port of Liverpool
They returned me to
Two pounds ten a week, that was my pay

I've got a feeling, a feeling deep inside
Oh yeah, Oh yeah.
I've got a feeling, a feeling I can't hide
Oh no. Oh no, Oh no,
Yeah I've got a feeling.

Oh please believe me, I'd hate to miss the train
Oh yeah, Oh yeah.
And if you leave me I won't be late again
Oh no, Oh no, Oh no.
Yeah I've got a feeling yeah.

All these years I've been wandering around,
Wondering how come nobody told me
All that I was looking for was somebody
Who looked like you.

Ev'rybody had a hard year
Ev'rybody had a good time
Ev'rybody had a wet dream,
Ev'rybody saw the sunshine
Oh yeah, Oh yeah.
Ev'rybody had a good year,
Ev'rybody let their hair down,
Ev'rybody pulled their socks up,
Ev'rybody put their foot down.
Oh yeah, Oh yeah.

Oh my soul... so odd.

My baby says she's trav'ling on the one after 909
I said move over honey I'm travelling on that line
I said move over once, move over twice
Come on baby don't be cold as ice.

I said I'm trav'ling on the one after 909 I begged her not to
go and I begged her on my bended knees,
You're only fooling around, you're fooling around with me.
I said move over once, move over twice
Come on baby don't be cold as ice.

I said I'm trav'ling on the one after 909
I got my bag, run to the station
Railman says you've got the the wrong location
I got my bag, run right home
Then I find I've got the number wrong

Well I said I'm trav'ling on the one after 909
I said move over honey I'm travelling on that line
I said move over once, move over twice
Come on baby don't be cold as ice.

I said we're trav'ling on the one after 9 0,
I said we're trav'ling on the one after 9 0,
I said we're trav'ling on the one after 909.

["Danny Boy..."]

The long and winding road that leads to your door,
Will never disappear,
I've seen that road before It always leads me here,
Leads me to your door.

The wild and windy night the rain washed away,
Has left a pool of tears crying for the day.
Why leave me standing here, let me know the way
Many times I've been alone and many times I've cried
Anyway you'll never know the many ways I've tried, but
Still they lead me back to the long and winding road
You left me standing here a long, long time ago
Don't leave me waiting here, lead me to you door
Da, da, da, da

[Queen says no to pot smoking FBI members]

Because you're sweet and lovely girl I love you,
Because you're sweet and lovely girl it's true,
I love you more than ever girl I do.
I want you in the morining girl I love you,
I want you at the moment I feel blue,
I'm living ev'ry moment girl for you.
I've loved you from the moment I saw you,
You looked at me that's all you had to do,
I feel it now I hope you feel it too.
Because you're sweet and lovely girl I love you,
Because you're sweet and lovely girl it's true,
I love you more than ever girl I do.
I really love you.

[Sweet Loretta Fat thought she was a cleaner but she was a frying pan.]

Jojo was a man who thought he was a loner
But he knew it wouldn't last.
Jojo left his home in Tucson, Arizona
For some California grass.
Get back, get back.
Get back to where you once belonged
Get back, get back.
Get back to where you once belonged.
Get back Jojo. Go home
Get back, get back.
Back to where you once belonged
Get back, get back.
Back to where you once belonged.
Get back Jo.

Sweet Loretta Martin thought she was a woman
But she was another man
All the girls around her say she's got it coming
But she gets it while she can
Get back, get back.
Get back to where you once belonged
Get back, get back.
Get back to where you once belonged.
Get back Loretta. Go home
Get back, get back.
Get back to where you once belonged
Get back, get back.
Get back to where you once belonged.
Get back Loretta
Your mother's waiting for you
Wearing her high-heel shoes
And her low-neck sweater
Get on home Loretta
Get back, get back.
Get back to where you once belonged.

[Thanks, Mo! ...on behalf of the group I hope we passed the audition.]